Sublimation

Divert Destructive Impulses Into Productivity

I recently learned a new word – sublimation. Sublimation is taking a destructive impulse and diverting it so that the energy behind the impulse is put towards a more socially acceptable, moral, or aesthetic use. Basically, turn destructive impulses into productivity. Stop wasting time and do something constructive instead. Pretty straight forward, but often easier said than done.

Every action is a choice. We can choose to sit on the couch and eat Cheetos or go to the gym and eat meat and vegetables. We can choose to masturbate or go ask a stranger out on a date. And we can mindlessly surf the internet or cable TV, or we can work on a project that requires our attention and effort, or take care of something we’ve been putting off.

And each choice contributes to who we are mentally and physically. Over time the choices add up. The more we choose the destructive or easy path, the more we destruct or become inclined to choose to do what’s easy instead of doing the more difficult or unpleasant things that actually move us forward. The more we choose to be productive instead, the more we achieve over time and the more momentum we gain to continue doing and accomplishing difficult things.

There’s nothing wrong with occasional indulgences and lazy days. And they can even be healthy in their own way.

But I know from experience that while choosing the more destructive or lazy impulse is easier and perhaps more fun, it ultimately leaves me feeling depressed. Every time. I literally feel like the frequency of my vibration gets diminished.

Vicious Cycles

The problem with choosing actions that lower one’s vibration, is that lower vibrations and a depressed mood promote an even stronger desire to seek more fleeting pleasure. We begin looking for temporary distractions from the low mood.

If we choose to binge drink, the likely outcomes might be making poor food choices, staying up until the wee hours, and waking up hungover.

Connecting with old friends you haven’t seen in a while? Sure, go ahead and let loose. I’m not suggesting anyone should be a puritan.

But if this becomes a choice several times a week, year round, that means a lot of days of waking up feeling like shit. And what do people do when they feel like shit? They might eat unhealthy food, watch TV with the shades drawn, sleep during the productive part of the day, and very likely drink more the next evening to try and feel a little better.

And if someone chooses to self stimulate at home, they aren’t going out into the world and trying to find a sexual partner which would be a far more positive way of finding pleasure. If a man just resists playing with himself he’ll eventually get used to not requiring constant release. And he’ll feel more aggressive and assertive which he’ll ultimately prefer. Then he’ll be more likely to go into the world and find a female partner. It’s clear which choice will lead toward becoming a more fulfilled person in the long run.

When Life Dishes Out Tough Times

It’s worth acknowledging that the desire to numb the mind with substances, avoid reality by partying every night, or hide out with a tub of Ben & Jerry’s and the shades drawn, is sometimes driven by circumstances outside of our control. Life can be unkind at times. People lose loved ones and jobs, have fights with friends and family, or get sick. It doesn’t seem fair.

But these are the most opportune times to build character through sublimation. There is always something constructive that can be done during hard times. And choosing to do difficult things you’d rather not do while carrying the heavy weight of life will build immense willpower.

Yes, life hurts like hell sometimes. But instead of killing a bottle of Jameson you might consider doing some brutally hard exercise instead. I guarantee it will make you feel good. Yes, it’s a fleeting high in its own right. But the difference is that it’ll leave you feeling good after the fact as well. And you’ll be stronger and healthier.

The point isn’t to make light of life’s terrible times. But to bring awareness to the fact that these are times when we can build exceptional spiritual strength and resilience if we look at it differently.

Better Alternatives

Next time you’re feeling a desire to do something that you know isn’t going to make you feel better or stronger, find a better alternative. If you can’t think of anything in particular, just look around for something you’ve been putting off. You can even just clean up around the house or mow the lawn. It doesn’t require a huge, monumental project to shift one’s energy from unproductive to productive. That said, maybe you’re starting a blog, learning an instrument, trying to improve your back squat, or studying for a test of some sort. If so, those are great uses of energy that will cultivate a positive feeling of forward motion.

Whatever you decide to do, just pay attention to how it makes you feel. If it leaves you feeling negative, doubtful, depressed, or unsure in any way, stop doing it. If it makes you feel alive, healthy, closer to your difficult goals, or happy, do it more. Again, it’s easier said than done. But well worth the effort to turn destructive impulses into productivity.