It’s not unusual to hit spells where I lose the momentum and desire to be productive. The ideas don’t flow, I feel less enthusiastic and inspired, and my mind is a bit slower than usual for whatever reason. And it’s easy to slip into a depressed state of mind as a result, even feeling a bit worthless, because I just don’t feel like myself. At these times I can fall back into old habits, thinking about using substances to dull the nagging depression, aimlessly surfing on the internet, etc.
But I know where that would lead. That would just dig an even deeper hole. And that is the last place I want to find myself. I never want to wake up feeling worse than the day before because I used the wrong tactics to deal with a lackluster yesterday.
So I do one of a few things (or all of them). And this is where having some goals and passions comes in very handy. I generally either look to physical training or my creative pursuits.
First, the training option. I prescribe to the notion espoused by Mark Rippetoe that training is based around a plan to improve in some specific way with a well thought out approach that moves one incrementally towards their goal. And exercise is something that is done for the way it makes a person feel that day. However, despite a focus on training over simple exercise, I think training is a means to both ends. It is a step in a process, but it also leaves me feeling really good.
I’m currently in the middle of a Texas Method training program to continue improving my squat, deadlift, press and bench press strength. And every time I complete a training session and add a few pounds to my lifts, I experience the positive mentality and dopamine boost of attaining a new level of physical strength and ability. I also feel a release of pent up frustration and negative energy, and that gets replaced with fresh, constructive energy. And honestly, it makes me feel happy.
I might also look to music and writing to trigger a feeling of forward movement. I’ve set goals to both get back to playing live music, and share positive life experiences and thoughts through this blog. If either becomes a way to make money, that’s great. But most importantly, when I work on either I get a feeling of satisfaction. I don’t have to spend all day on these pursuits to feel fulfilled either. If I’m having a sub-par day where my sense of focus is lacking and I feel my usual self confidence waning, I can work on music or writing for an hour and feel uplifted by it.
Maybe I set a goal to learn a new technique, scale, or song on the guitar. If I can spend an hour and know that I gained a new skill or new knowledge, then I feel genuinely good. Or if I decide to write the outline for an article that I’ll finish another time, I feel like I did something productive even if it wasn’t a huge undertaking. And I feel better than when I started. That little bit of momentum and positive forward motion reinforces an urge to be productive in other ways as well.
Even if I’m lower energy and not feeling like doing a lot, if I’ve done some training and physical exertion and/or worked on my passions and have chipped away at a goal or improved my skill set in some way, then I’ll be more likely to make productive choices in my relaxation afterwards. I’ll avoid using substances to feel better because I already feel good. I might read a book instead of looking at social media. Perhaps I’ll cook good fresh food instead of grabbing something out. Or maybe I’ll catch up with an old friend instead of lounging on the couch and watching Netlix.
As a slight side note, I’ll also add that as a divorced bachelor I’m sometimes lonely. Instead of wallowing in it, I’ll go out into public and talk to people. Most notably I’ll chat up some pretty young ladies and ask them out. Even if I don’t get any phone numbers or solid connections, I still feel a whole lot better for having made the effort. Social skills require a bit of momentum as well. And sustained momentum helps me feel more confident that I can go out again the next day and try again with some new girls. After all, that persistence is what it takes.
Some days, we’re going to naturally be less productive than others, but we can always do some simple things to maintain our state of mind and avoid falling into a rut that saps our happiness and energy. Action begets action, so when in doubt, just set a small goal that will contribute to your larger goals, get up and do it, and you’ll feel much happier and more fulfilled when you finish.